i'm a selfish brat.

I need to be more.. sensitive, I was going to say supportive, but I'm a supportive girlfriend. I think so anyway. I actually pretend to listen for real when he talks about blow out valves and running straight pipe and blah blah blah whateva. But I reallly listen when he calls me princess and pretty girl.

My problem is the rest of the world is simply an interruption to my world, and sometimes I have more going on in my head than I can handle and I don't stop to think about little things in life.

What brought this up is boyfriend usually spends the night over here, and I'm so comfortable at home that I don't think it would be nice to spend the night over there more. In all honesty, it was never a big deal when I was never home, I would go days without seeing my mom and I technically lived in the same house. Then I moved to Georgia and began missing her horribly and then she got the cancer so I don't want to not be with her, I guess. But this period in my life was when I was working 50+ hours a week, spending the night with my ex boyfriend, and I would go to work for at least 8 hours, not come home until my mom was sleeping, if at all, and then do the same thing the next day. So the point is I just don't think all the time. And I'm not this comfortable anywhere else, not even my own daddy's house, just here with my ma and step dad and dog and cats and Guido, the fish.

I mean I feel bad, but hello we can talk about being pregnant freely in this house and my mom walked in on us having sex and all she said was "oh my god, you guys just got home from a hotel", I don't know and maybe I just need to quit being so selfish.. I mean I love boyfriend's parents and I think they are adorable and his mom is so neat and crafty and I loooove that, and his dad has an amazing sense of humor, and has a huge heart and.. most of all they give me real hope that true love still exists and they make me smile just watching them..I need to quit being selfish. That's all.

New goal: Use my head.